Can I help you? (Open)

Click, click, click, click... click... click... With a final click, Frank stopped turning the knob sticking out of his head as he sat on a bed in the hospital wing. Smiling to himself, he went back to what he was working on. In an unfortunate alchemy accident, Frank happened to blow his hand off. Luckily, however, that German he dissected the other day had the same size of hands as him.

"That's better," Frank said as he finished sewing his new hand to his arm. The skin was slightly more tanned than Frank's normal skin, but other than that, it was perfect. That German had the perfect bone structure, damn near identical to Frank's own. Frank had taken it upon himself to harvest as many body parts and organs as he could.

"Meeoooooooow..." came a deathly noise from Frank's feet, and he looked down to see his greatest success and greatest failure. On the floor stood a smelly tabby/persian/manx/American shorthair cat, which, much like Frank, had been cut apart and sewn together. It was a type of Inferi magic that he had used to create this cat, but he had been hoping for it to be able to have some measure of sentient thought, but sadly, it was just another puppet. He liked little Franky too much to get rid of him, though.

Footsteps were heard from the doorway, and Frank got off the bed, picking up Franky and turning to the visitor. "Yes, can I help you?" he asked, looking very strange holding the cat, as it was still in a state of rigor mortis, and couldn't bend its limbs.

When Scott was walking past the Hospital Wing, he heard what he thought was a dying cat getting run over several times. An eyebrow arched as his head swung over his shoulder in the direction it came from. Something inside of him really didn't want to bother to go find out what it was because it was probably messy, but the other part of him was quite curious.

When he rounded the corner of the door he stopped at the entrance, looking disgusted. A man that looked like he had been bits and pieces of different men, sewn together was standing there, holding a special cat.

"The fuck is that?" He asked, throwing up a hand and pointing to the cat. "Actually, what the fuck are you? You are certainly not fabulous.." Scott muttered.

Frank stared at the strange character who had just entered the Hospital Wing. He was... strange... He seemed to give off this aura of strangeness, if that was even a word. Either way, he was very strange, and Frank felt strangely uncomfortable looking at him.

"The fuck is that?" the strange man asked in disgust, pointing at Franky. "Actually, what the fuck are you? You are certainly not fabulous.."

Frank blinked behind his glasses. "It's not my intention to be, er, fabulous," he said, shaking his head. "My goal is to be a great scientist, not... fabulous..." he muttered as he put Franky down on the ground, watching the cat walking away on stiff legs.

"Now, is there anything I can help you with?"

"It's not my intentions to be, er fabulous. My goal is to be a great scientist, not... fabulous.. Now, is there anything I can help you with? The seemingly crazy man had asked Scott. He really didn't even know what to say to him. The man's goal was not to be fabulous, but to be a great scientist? The fuck kind of goal is that, Scott wondered, two seconds from wondering out loud.

"Yes, there is something you can help me with. I'm just trying to figure this out and I really just cannot fathom it. So you tell me your goal is not to be fabulous yet you are, I'm assuming, the school's new nurse? Clearly there is something wrong in this picture." Scott threw his hands up animatedly whilst talking. When the blond had heard that the new healer for the school was a man, he had got excited. They were the school nurse and a man. Clearly, he should be gay, which is exactly what he was expecting. He was expecting a nice, young handsome gay man for him to have fun with this year, but instead of got some weird old guy. Scott was certainly not pleased with this.

"Yes, there is something you can help me with. I'm just trying to figure this out and I really just cannot fathom it. So you tell me your goal is not to be fabulous yet you are, I'm assuming, the school's new nurse? Clearly there is something wrong in this picture."

Frank felt his eyebrow twitch. "Yes, there's clearly something wrong with this picture," he admitted. "You're in it. I'm the School Healer, not School Nurse, okay? If you call me nurse again, I will strap you down on the table in my office and dissect you while you're still awake."

Grumbling, Frank shook his head and moved his new left hand, flexing the fingers and clenching it into a fist. It seemed to be working just fine. "Now, if there is nothing wrong with you, I insist you get out of here right now."

"Yes, there's clearly something wrong with this picture. You're in it. I'm the School Healer, not School Nurse, okay? If you call me nurse again, I will strap you down on the table in my office and dissect you while you're still awake."

Scott quickly pouted. Why couldn't he call him the school nurse? He certainly was the nurse..

"But men can be nurses too. Hell if I didn't have such a need to clean, I think I probably would have became a nurse. I mean most male nurses are quite fabulous."

For whatever reason, the twenty-five-year-old had taken a few seconds longer to process that the elderly man had threatened him.

"And why are you threatening me? Just because I'll be cleaning up after yo' shit does not mean you can threaten me, Mr. I-need-to-go-shopping-and-get-some-clothes-and-possibly-and-new-face." Scott never really did realize how animated he was when he spoke, his hands all over the place. "Are you mad? You seem mad. Stay mad cos I don't give a fuck." The man looked down at the.. what looked like some sort of cat, "And I swear to god, this bitch better not make a mess unless you have some sort of death wish. This castle is going to be spotless and it is going to stay that way."

"But men can be nurses too. Hell if I didn't have such a need to clean, I think I probably would have became a nurse. I mean most male nurses are quite fabulous."

"But like I said, I don't intend to be fabulous," Frank stated simply. "I am a Healer and a scientist, not a nurse."

Frank's eyebrow twitched again in annoyance as he watched, rather than listened, to the man speaking. And people called Frank crazy. How could the Headmistress let this guy into the castle? Then again, she let Frank into the castle, so it wasn't really strange that she might let someone even crazier inside.

Sighing, Frank took out a cigarette and put it in his mouth, lighting it with his wand. Then, he promptly turned his back on the flamboyant creature who had stepped into the Hospital Wing. "Maybe if I get a working heart implanted in Franky, I can counter-act the rigor mortis..." he muttered to himself, looking down at Franky, who gave off another ghastly mewl.

Scott listened to the "Healer" talk about putting a heart in, what he believed to be a cat. That was enough to get him to leave. He wasn't exactly sure what this man was going on about, but truth be told, did he really want to? All he knew was he could feel a mess coming on and he wasn't too excited about it. Normally Scott was pretty happy to clean up, but there was a feeling inside his gut telling him that he was going to really hate cleaning up this man's mess.

"Oh, and before I leave, if you put a heart in that thing, bitch, do not make a mess."

Michael sighed, limping his way up the stairs to the MedWing. He and Jake fought again. Broke several ribs, fractured his jaw, busted two wisdom teeth, forcibly removed another, and his knee acted up again because of the fight. But, as always, it was, for lack of a better word, awesome. They were Irish. They enjoyed fighting. It's what they did. It's what they always did, and would always do.

Hell, at Michael's wedding, they beat the shit out of each other, and it was memorable for everyone there.

Now, he was limping his way up to go see Frank. he wished it was someone a little less of a sociopath, but apparently the Headmistress liked his personality. Or, rather, lack of empathy. At any rate, Michael knew Frank for a good few years, and he knew that he was a good doctor. When he was properly motivated, at any rate. It was why Michael had picked up his favorite pack of smokes on the way up.

Finally making it to the MedWing's door, he was about to knock when Scott, the Caretaker of the school and possibly one of the gayest men he had ever met. He stuck to the shadows with him, and sighed when he left. Thank god. He entered the MedWing and waved at Frank. "Ho, Frank," he said, limping in. He shut the door behind him.

"I need your help, Frank," He said, taking out the pack of cigarettes and tossing them to the mad scientist. "Can ya heal me up? Without dissecting me, of course." He sat on the hospital bed, and sighed.

"I also need some more medication, for my leg. It's been bothering me again, and I just need something to take my mind off it."

Lolita wondered what she could get up to, even for a book enthusiast such as her there was no way that spending 48 hours in a library was good for someone, so she had decided it was probably better for her to go and have a walk about.

Hearing some conversation going on from behind a closed door she wondered if she should enter, and she dithered outside a while before realising that she was standing outside of the hospital wing and she knocked, carefully on the door before entering.

Looking around she smiled a little and suddenly asked herself why she actually came in here.

"Oh, um, hi..."

Suddenly she felt very, very stupid.

"I just thought that um...I would come in to introduce myself, but that's a bit stupid...uhm...I should really just stick to books, that'd be a great idea." she sighed

Frank blinked at the parting words of the flamboyant creature, and when he was gone, he muttered to himself, "What a strange person..." And coming from Frank, that was pretty damn strange. He shook his head and looked around for Franky, but he didn't get to do any more work on him, for at that moment, the Deputy Headmaster and Potions teacher Michael McBride came in.

"I need your help, Frank," Michael said, tossing Frank a pack of cigarettes, which he caught. Ooh, Crown! Very nice, he remembered. "Can ya heal me up? Without dissecting me, of course." Frank frowned in disappointment when he heard the man and looked him over.

"Too bad. I would have liked you to have been in an explosion or something," Frank said, frowning. "It would have given me an opportunity to try some limb transplantations."

"I also need some more medication, for my leg. It's been bothering me again, and I just need something to take my mind off it."

"I need, I need, you need a lot of things, don't you?" Frank asked as he walked over to Michael, waving his wand over him and examining him. Broken ribs, fractured jaw, three teeth in need of repair... Oh, how he would have loved this excuse to cut Michael open, but he did give him the cigarettes...

Frank was just about to heal Michael when the door opened, and a woman stepped inside, smiling. "Oh, um, hi..." she said, sounding a bit uncertain. "I just thought that um...I would come in to introduce myself, but that's a bit stupid...uhm...I should really just stick to books, that'd be a great idea."

Frank, his eyes on the girl, rapped Michael three times on the head with his wand hard, healing his ribs, jaw and teeth. "What a beautiful specimen," he said, wandering over to the girl. "Tell me, dear, would you be opposed to me performing a dissection on you?"

Lolita flushed softly and was a little befuddled by the strange doctor who seemed to be the resident healer, she shook her head good naturedly, of course the man must be joking, what a weird sense of humour she thought to herself.

"No no I don't think so. Who else will look after the library."

Smiling a little wider Lolita stuck out her hand to shake the Healers, and nodded politely at the man who had come in in need of some treatment.

"Lolita Bradshaw, librarian. And you are?"

"No no I don't think so. Who else will look after the library." Immediately a frown made its way onto his face. Why did he always have to ask? A quick Stunner, and she would've been his to experiment on however he wanted! Although... Yeah, the Headmistress would surely have found out... "Lolita Bradshaw, librarian. And you are?"

Reluctantly, Frank reached out and shook the girl's hand. "Frank Stein, School Healer and Counselor," he introduced himself and let go of her hand, before letting his smoked up cigarette drop to the floor, where he stepped on it and immediately took out another one.

"Did you need anything, or are you just here to taunt me with that cuttable body of yours?" Cuttable? Frank seemed to be making up words a lot today...

Lolita bit her lip she didn't know why but she must have upset him but she didn't know why, was he actually being serious when he asked if she wanted to be cut up? If so...that set her on edge a little.

"Hey, I'm sorry...Uhm..."

She wondered if it would be best to humour him or wait and see what his reaction would be, people were not as easy to read as books. But that was a challenge, and Lolita liked to rise to challenges whenever she could.

His handshake was reluctant, strange when he had wanted to cut her open moments before.

"No I didn't come in for anything really, I just wanted to get a break from staring at books for days on end. Do you want me to go?"

Lolita didn't want to overstay her welcome, but she was intrigued by the man.

"Cuttable...?" she mused "Is that a compliment?"

"No I didn't come in for anything really, I just wanted to get a break from staring at books for days on end. Do you want me to go?"

Frank sighed and turned his back on the woman. "No, go on, stay, this seems to be the cool kid hangout these days," he muttered sarcastically. Then, he looked back when the woman spoke again. "Yes, cuttable was a compliment. It means that I would very much like to cut into your flesh," he explained, sounding as if he was talking to a complete idiot. "I- Franky!"

Franky had wandered into view, and in his rigor mortis'd walk, he had wandered right into the door to Franks office, which opened to an inhuman scream. Frank rushed over and picked up the class, closing the door, which immediately cut off the scream coming from inside.

Frank chuckled disarmingly as he petted the re-animated cat, hoping none of the faculty in the room would tell anyone what they had just heard. Wouldn't do if the Headmistress looked through his office. "Don't worry about that, folks..."

Lolita thought that although quite backhanded asking her to stay was rather odd she would do so anyway, there was nothing else to do and she sat down on one of the beds, she smiled softly at the man who had just been healed, asking him:

"Hey, what happened to you?" she asked, a bit concerned

As Frank tailed off his speech Lolita looked where his gaze was directed and she strained to see what was there, although it appeared something was moving.

"Well then thank you, I guess. You're very..." she searched for a compliment "Innovative in your medical advances."

Although as she said that Lolita wished that she hadn't, her mouth hung open a little bit as she saw the cat, what was the matter with it? Why was it moving so stiffly...? Surely he wouldn't have cut up a cat? What would be gained? Better than a human though...

"Okay...I don't even want to know."

Lolita said wide eyed as the screams were cut off from inside the beakers office, it was just something she didn't want to dwell on even though she should.

Scott was cleaning something down the hall when he was sure that he could something hit the ground and the sound of a foot rubbing it in. It was like Scott hand inhuman hearing for when someone was making a mess. A certainly that sound was coming from the Hospital Wing. Oh hell no, he thought as he started to walk in its direction. He had just warned that man about keeping that room clean and not making a mess. The young man was just a few feet away from the door when he heard some screams that weren't human at all. Getting just more aggravated about the mess, he stormed in there.

Instantly spotting the cigarette that was rubbed into the floor, his eyes flew up to the elderly man whilst throwing his hands up in the air. "What the fuck did I just tell you about making a mess, you ugly ass bitch?" Perhaps Scott never got the memo about keeping swearing to a minimum. Truth be told, Scott wasn't so sure himself that he could go a day without swearing. It made up a good amount of his vocabulary.

"I'm not even gonna ask about those damn, weird ass screams." The caretaker looked over to find a new member of the staff he had not seen before, "hi whatever the hell yo' name is." Normally, he would have introduced himself, but his eyes were on Michael who had been just standing there. "Oh, hello my little lovebug, you've been hiding from me~" He promptly walked over to Michael, embracing the other man in a hug.

Lolita jumped as the man entered the room and she blinked as he proceeded to swear like a sailor, she was both disgusted and quite annoyed at his rude attitude when not only entering a room but entering a conversation.

Almost backhandedly he said hello to her then went to persecute the poor man who had just been healed, she shook her head and tried to let her anger out in a deep shuddering breath but it didn't work.

"Excuse me. But that is not how one enters a room, and that is definately not how to make a good impression, insulting my new acquaintance and swearing like a sailor then promptly ignoring me when you had made a hurried introduction."

Lolita sighed and crossed her arms, looking at the new man who's name she didn't even know.

"I'm Lolita Bradshaw. Librarian. And you are?"

Throwing a look to Frank Lolita almost looked like she was White, she got that way when she was annoyed and she hoped Frank was not ashamed by her outburst.

Oh, dear, that creature was back... "What the fuck did I just tell you about making a mess, you ugly ass bitch?" the creature yelled, waving his arms again. He was a very... energetic character. If he wasn't so infuriating, Frank would have asked if he could take his arms... Frank opened his mouth to respond, but the girl, Lolita, beat him to it.

"Excuse me. But that is not how one enters a room, and that is definately not how to make a good impression, insulting my new acquaintance and swearing like a sailor then promptly ignoring me when you had made a hurried introduction."

"Oooh, I like this one," Frank told Michael, grinning widely. The grin, however, vanished when he looked at the flaming creature who had so rudely interrupted their conversation. "Excuse me, stupid one, but I clean the Hospital Wing myself, thank you..."

Shaking his head, he watched the man strut over to Michael. Then, he turned to Lolita, who was looking at him with... fear? "Now, where were we, dear?"

Michael sighed through Frank's rant. Then the new Librarian came in, and he smiled, waving. Before Frank hit his head with his wand three times, Michael wincing each and ever time, he felt the unnatural feeling of his wounds healing quickly, especially his teeth. Except for his knee, of course. He thought his knee was shot with some kind of enchanted bullet, at times. But that would be ridiculous. He watched the interaction, and was... perplexed. The new Librarian, Lolita, wasn't afraid of Frank. In fact, he was rather surprised that the two had quite a chemistry.

He watched as Lolita walked over and sat on a bed next to his. "Hey, what happened to you?" Michael shrugged. "I was born Irish," Michael said, grinning. though, that grin left his face when Scott came back. He sighed.

"Sweet Jay-sus..." He said, his deep Irish accent coming out. Over the years, he his Irish Accent had been watered down, soon being a mix between Irish and Londoner. But his Irish Accent came out in certain times. "Oh, hello my little lovebug, you've been hiding from me~" Michael sighed, wearing a distressed expression on his face. He said to himself, "No no no no no no no!" Until Scott embraced him.

"Scott, you've got five seconds to release me before I break your arms," Michael angrily said. "In fact, I might not wait the five seconds. I might as well break every bone in your body."

Scott frowned once Michael had threatened to break his bones. Albeit, once he let go, he realized how much it turned him on when Michael threatened him. He was just so.. dominating and rough, which was exactly what Scott liked. The former Slytherin's frown quickly turned into a smirk before he looked over to the girl he had quickly said hi to because he was too busy wanting to hug his Michael.

"First of all, I don't give a fuck if that's not how to enter a room. Here let me pull out the fucks I give, bitch," he said animatedly as he put his hand in his pocket and showed her an empty hand, "there's the fucks I give. And that's how I talk to the old, nasty fuck. If you got a problem with it, good. Cos I don't care. I only gave you a hurried introduction because I saw my man. Clearly, you had to be a little bitch about it, Lolita."

Scott quickly threw his hand up, he just couldn't handle the whining. It didn't take the man long to decide if he liked a person or not and after Lolita's outburst, she hopped onto the list of "bitches that need to be slapped" as quickly as she had opened her mouth.

"I am Scott motherfuckin' Young and you girl," he looked her up and down, "are not fabulous, so get out of my face."

Lolita looked at the Caretaker and she blinked. What a complete and utter bone head. Although she didn't say them, she had plenty of points to rebuke his own but she bit her tongue she wasn't raised to have a mudslinging match with some stranger who blatantly needed to be knocked down a few pegs.

Smiling happily at the man, Scott, she shrugged her shoulders in a carefree manner.

"If you say so!"

Lolita said cheerily.

Instead she turned to Frank and let the smile dim a bit, her eyes flashing with anger at the man she had just spoken to but she kept a lid on her anger well, you wouldn't have been able to tell. Lolita gestures to the cat and she smiled happily:

"I was just saying how unique and innovative your medical advances are, you must be proud, I know I would be having created something from dead tissue."

Lolita turned to the other man, Michael, and she threw him a swift sympathetic look before saying: "Irish hmm? That genetic codes for getting into fights then?"

Michael sighed in relief as Scott let go of him. Thank god. He walked away quickly, siding over with Lolita and Frank. He grated his teeth at Scott's attitude, wondering why the Headmistress would hire this man. He was... unprofessional. It was going to get the man killed. More than likely by Michael himself. He was about to step to the defense for the woman who was so very kind to him - and more to the point, couldn't stand Scott as well - when she just... ignored Scott. Perhaps that's what he should've done, but with Scott touching him over and over it was hard to ignore the little prat. He was surprised when Lolita turned around to talk to Frank. Again.

"I was just saying how unique and innovative your medical advances are, you must be proud, I know I would be having created something from dead tissue." This girl was... something else. He sighed again, before Lolita twirled to face him, a look of what appeared to be sympathy on her face. Just perfect.

"Irish hmm? That genetic codes for getting into fights then?" Michael shrugged. "It was a joke. Jake, the DADA teacher, and I just like to fight. It's what we did as kids; when there was no one else to fight, we fought each other. It's a kind of daily ritual, by now." Michael sighed as he walked over to Frank, and crouched down to pet Franky. Franky was rather innovative, if he had any say. He stood back up, and looked at Frank.

"Hey, Frank, do you need any new Potions ingredients? I just got a shipment of Chimera Tails that I think you might be interested in," Michael said, pulling out a cigar. "They're still alive."

"I was just saying how unique and innovative your medical advances are, you must be proud, I know I would be having created something from dead tissue."

Frank's chest puffed out with pride. Finally, someone who understood that his experiments weren't something to be feared. His research would revolutionize medicine, creating life out of dead tissue as Lolita said. "Yes, I am, of course, very proud of my advances so far."

Frank gestured for the cat hobbling around the Hospital Wing. "Franky here, he's just the beginning. I am working on something bigger, much, much bigger. I intend to create a human life," he admitted. He had never revealed his secret project to anyone before. "Junior will be the greatest experiment in human history."

Grinning widely, Frank puffed happily on his cigarette as Michael came over. "Hey, Frank, do you need any new Potions ingredients? I just got a shipment of Chimera Tails that I think you might be interested in," Michael said as he took out a cigar. "They're still alive."

Immediately, Frank swiped the cigar from out of Michael's hand and pocketed it. "No smoking in the Hospital Wing," he said simply, but in all honesty, he just hated cigar smoke. "And I'll take them, so long as they're fresh, and you don't try to double the price like you did last time."

Lolita smiled softly and she nodded, although she hadn't had anything like this occur to her she could understand the concept, it was part of their friendship, or their bond, to do that and in a way she was jealous, she wished she had someone like that.

"Well that makes sense, are you guys from around the same area then yes? It's hard for me to make friends because I'm not from around here, Im in a new work and a new country."

Laughing quietly, Lolita turned to sit on the bed a little further back while the two boys talked shop, she wondered, briefly, what they could be used for but them she reeled off a load of medical uses for them in her mind and then understood.

"I'm glad! Few people admit to being proud of their work, modesty only gets you so far, its best to endorse your work yourself rather than down play it."

Lolita's eyes widened and she bit her lip, Frank was working on something that was bigger than Franky? A person?! She suddenly remembered one of her favourite books 'Frankenstein' and hoped that Frank wouldnt end up like the creator in that.

"That must be an awful lot of work, have you already began construction? Did you use transfiguration of elements to create the body?" blushing slightly Lolita ducked her head "Forgive me, I ask a lot of questions."