The Last (Open)

The Doctor stuffed his hands in his pockets as he wandered around, noting the way the world worked around him as if he wasn't even there. He supposed that was just how the world was. When he died the world would just keep on turning. There wouldn't be any profound silence and no one would stop their lives to mourn the loss of his.

And that was how it should be, he decided as he stood there quietly, the world should not mourn the loss of one man. Especially not a man such as he. Or perhaps it was more 'even a man like him'? He didn't know. Did he really make a difference in the world?

He liked to think that he'd made a difference, and for the better too. The Doctor had stopped several time-space-related accidents, or incidents, in his day. Perhaps those made a difference. But either way, it wouldn't matter.

Because, through days of morbid research, The Doctor knew when he was to die.

Raven had been wandering through the lunar trap, she was trying to avoid being bothered by werewolves while she collected some of the crystals that lay nearby to give away as favours to the long put off wedding between her and Konig, things always seemed to delay it that little bit longer much to her frustration.

Then she felt that there was something, or someone close by and immediately drew her wand, if it was a werewolf it might be trouble, but upon closer inspection she found it to be a human and one that she knew quite well, and who had been quite forgotten as of late.

Approaching the Doctor she grinned at him and gave a jaunty wave, signalling she was here as opposed to just appearing.

"Long time no speak Doctor." she stated, flicking a leaf off her shoulder "What brings you to this place?"

The Doctor caught sight of Raven waving to him and smiled slightly before waving back to her. He had been waiting patiently for her wedding to Konig and had, in fact, visited the wedding in the future. It was a magical day and he knew that she would love it as much as any of her guests, all of whom had had nothing but praise for it,

"Indeed Raven, indeed." he agreed with a small smile. He seemed to have gotten a reputation as being silent in recent months, "Oh I was just reflecting."

It was true enough he supposed. Taking it off from around his neck, The Doctor idly played with the TARDIS for a moment before turning to Raven with a small smirk,

"I did something a little silly." he told her, "I did a lot of research... and found the date and time of my death."

Raven was looking at one of the few men that she could call a friend, she didn't want that many of them but the ones that she had she would do almost anything for, even the man who stole away her lover she considered a best friend, however strange that might be to consider for most people.

"You were just reflecting, you appear to have just reflected for the longest of times, since the war ended I would say." she hummed, stalking her way closer, tapping her chin her violet eyes wandering over the Doctor "Something is different this time."

Seeing him take off his TARDIS she raised an eyebrow, so it was something to do with his time travel was it? Well that surely could not be good, it could mean the end of it all, or it could mean something far more serious than that.

Blinking Raven couldn't help but look a little shocked; "Well that was stupid." she stated swiftly "Whatever posessed you to meddle into affairs like that?"

The Doctor had to hand it to Raven, she could read him rather well. He had been reflecting. But he had been reflecting long before the war even started, let alone since it ended. No he had been thinking about things larger than himself for so long that he was often blind to the small problems,

"I have a lot to reflect on I think." he told her with the barest of smiles, "I have been reflecting on my actions for more years than I care to mention. Reflecting on horrible, terrible, things that I've done in the pursuit of a greater good... a greater good that I can no longer see clearly."

Seeing her glancing at the TARDIS he smiled a little. Like a lot of his problems, this one stemmed from time travel. He was the only man able to travel through time with ease. The laws of time bent for no man but they bent for him,

"Yes it was slightly stupid." he admitted with a small smile before shaking his head, "Something is coming Raven. Whenever I use the TARDIS... I... I'm beginning to hear... drums. They're getting louder Raven. Whatever the drums proceed... it's getting closer..."

Raven raised her eyebrows, she had never really had a conversation like this with the Doctor, perhaps that is what he needed, he seemed, and if he could tell this was what she thought it was probably a good thing, he seemed like he just needed a good slap to wake himself up from this haze he seemed to be in these days.

"Well then, if you can no longer see the greater good what is the point? Undo what you have done, make the future worse than it is going to be, riddled with disease and pain as it is already." Raven stated, knowing, the Doctor would not undo what he had done no matter how pointless it now seemed,

Hearing about the drums Raven did not know how to respond, of course, she knew what they could mean and she hoped that she would be able to help the man before it got to the point where it could no longer be helped.

"Hearing drums is the first sign of mental instability you know." she stated with a small hum "But the solution to your little problem is simply not to use the TARDIS then you wont hear them, very simple really."

The Doctor knew that he was dwelling on a past best left forgotten but he couldn't bring himself to look away from it. He was, for lack of a better word, ashamed of himself. His actions were something you didn't wish upon your worst enemies... let alone your own family,

"I would but it's past that point." he told her with a sad little smile, "My 'solution' has turned two groups who were, admittedly very destructive, into madmen, savages and cannibals. I can't free my family now."

Shaking his head, The Doctor grunted in annoyance. There was an answer to his problems right in front of him! He knew the drums from somewhere! Where did he know them from? The Doctor nodded a little bit,

"Yeah... maybe you're right." he said with a sigh, running his fingers through his hair, "Konig has scanned me... just stress he says. And some repressed memories but I'm well aware of what I'm repressing, just not the details."

Raven truly did not understand what the Doctor was so worried about, obviously these people had long been locked away and they were of no hazard to anyone, however if they had not been then they would have caused many problems for people not just in their own feud but others too.

"You can still free them if you kill them, thats what I would have done in the first place." Raven stated quite carefree "If they had been turned into these things, I would have rather spared them the suffering and killed them straight off."

The grunt of annoyance was something she had only rarely heard from the Doctor, normally it meant he needed to puzzle something out, and she knew she probably would not be able to help him much more beyond meagre advice. He needed to use it to sort his problems, or to ignore it as he saw fit.

"You cannot continue to allow yourself to be consumed by this...whatever the hell this has been Doctor, you have a school to run, and a little girl to take care of." Raven stated, now a hard quality to her voice, given the loss of Raven, she believed that those who had children ought not to waste a moment. "She needs you."

The Doctor gritted his teeth. It was in his very bones! He could feel that something was wrong, so very, very wrong. Something was going to happen and he knew, deep down, that it would be entirely his responsibility. He shook his head slowly,

"I don't kill people anymore. I did enough of that just to get them into the area." he told her quietly, "Well that's my greater sin isn't it? I'm not going to kill them. I'm letting them suffer like this. Oh well... it'll change soon... I can feel it."

He could see that she was leaving him alone to work out the problem but it was still just hanging on the tip of his tongue. When she mentioned Othala he paused and looked down with a small sigh. Putting his head in his hands, he groaned,

"I know that Raven and I'm trying, honestly I am." he told her before closing his eyes, "But it's... it's right there! Constantly! I don't know how to stop it..."

Raven raised her eyebrows and her eyes widened a little bit, God he was beginning to sound as crazy as she had when she had one of her episodes in the asylum just knowing something was going to happen, not being able to control his emotions and letting himself be ruled by them, that was what had happened to her.

"Well then more fool you." she stated quietly "If you had killed them all you wouldn't be in this position now, the people around you would not be put in this position either. There is nothing you can do about the past, but you can look to the future."

Not knowing how she should react to what the Doctor was doing, Raven tilted her head to one side and she sighed lightly, she was a little annoyed whatever this was seemed to take priority over everything else, and she knew if Viktoria were still here she would have been able to do something.

"She can sense something is wrong, we all can." she stated simply, because it was true, everyone knew something was wrong with the Doctor, it wouldn't be long before people started to talk freely of it "I don't know what to advise you Doctor, but it needs to stop, and soon."

The Doctor looked up at Raven and frowned for the first time at someone he considered a friend. It was a remarkable look for someone who seemed to be smiling almost constantly,

"I couldn't kill them alright?" he told her with a colder voice, "After wading through the blood of corrupted children, decaying old people by accelerating time so that they could not pollute the world with their 'knowledge' and after cutting down my friends and family so that they wouldn't tear time apart... I couldn't kill those who remained. It wasn't in me. So... so I ran away from it."

The Doctor closed his eyes and took several deep breaths. He smiled suddenly and nodded, standing up,

"You're right. And you know what that means?" he asked her with a falsely cheery smile that he was pushing to become more and more real, "It means that it's time for some jelly beans! Viktoria always told me that if I did something like this I should eat some jelly beans."

Raven found her eyes becoming dispursed with black like they did when she became angry, so just because she was giving him some form of comment he didn't want to hear he was going to snap at her? She was only trying to help, and this was Raven, she never helped anyone, even her dying 'apprentice'.

"There was no need for the dramatic statements of all the shit you've been through Doctor, we both know, I've been through my fair share of shit as well." she stated with a growl "If I changed, you certainly can, and you'd better do it sharpish before you push everyone away."

The false smile on the Doctors lips made Raven almost want to sigh again, he really was beginning to get on her nerves a little bit, at least now however he was trying to make himself somewhat happier, but he shouldn't waste it on her, he should act like this around Othala more.

"Ah...speaking of Viktoria..." she stated, tutting a little bit as she wondered whether to talk to him about this "I might have something to tell you."

The Doctor just decided to drop the line of conversation. He didn't have many friends, being naturally rather anti-social, and he didn't really want to lose Raven as a friend over a fight like this. If she had paid attention though she'd have realised that this wasn't a competition to see who had had the worst life, it was a reason as to why he didn't kill the rest. Meant in no way to bring up her own shitty past because she still had him beat hands down in that department.

The Doctor's false cheerfulness was beginning to make way for actual cheerfulness as he pushed the earlier feelings deep down inside of him. He'd deal with them later, when they weren't liable to hurt people when he let them out,

"Oh? Something to tell me?" he asked, a little bit confused before his eyes lit up and his smile grew, "Is it to do with Viktoria? Is she... is she a ghost?"

Raven was glad that the Doctor seemed to drop the conversation, she gradually felt herself calming down and her eyes were returning to her normal violet colour, she took a deep breath and leant shakily against the nearby tree. Her thoughts however went towards what she was going to tell the Doctor...

If he was already so unstable...should she really tell him? What would he do if she did, would he leave whatever this other thing was and move off onto helping Viktoria, she could find her, and she could craft her a new body, but it would mean opening herself up to the dark arts again, and her old addiction might arise again.

"When I was wearing my necromancer ring a few days ago, I did feel her presence nearby, I don't want to delve deeper than that but...there is someone who can tell you the answers that you want." Raven answered with a small smile "I will tell you, only if you promise to nip whatever this is in the bud, I don't need you obsessing over two projects."

The Doctor was still feeling that damned feeling. It refused to be ignored, it just sat there. And once again he felt the familarity of the feeling, like he had experienced it before and knew it. To be honest he had very few ideas as to what it could be. He just knew that whatever it was would be the death of him.

He could tell that she was hesitant to tell him what she had experienced through the ring. Of course she would be. If he was going insane it would push him further in that direction. And if she delved deeper into this then she risked losing what sanity she had clawed and fought for,

"I understand your reluctance Raven." he told her with an understanding smile before frowning a little bit, "Very well then Raven. If my attention must not be divided... I will put all of my effort into your project starting tomorrow. I will need tonight to purge thoughts from my mind and put fears to rest once and for all."

Raven hummed a little and she didn't know whether to believe the Doctor or not, of course she could always do something about it if she heard that he was still continuing with looking into the current project bothering him...it wouldn't be a very popular thing, but she would do it if needs be.

Hearing that he understood her reluctance, Raven raised an eyebrow and wondered if he really did understand why she was hesitant to tell him about Viktoria. But then, she supposed he did, you didn't become Head of Durmstrang without being able to empathise.

"You know, I don't believe you Doctor." she stated quite simply "If I know you, and I do, you wont really stop until you have found out what this is that's bugging you, even if you give me your word that you will." Raven developed, with a small frown on her brow.